Thursday, September 15, 2011

do something, he whispered

do something
he whispered
like I hadn't thought of that before
of course. do something.
because for months now we have been doing something
anything
everything
to fill the spaces,
do something
he whispered
like I hadn't tried that before
but how could I explain
that my bed felt too big for me now,
that the space next to me felt
as big and empty
as the space
that lay between us -
oceans, continents of space -
that the noise of another person's voice
could never
would never
ease pain that the absence of his brought,
do something
he whispered
like that has ever worked before
because believe me I have tried
but this distance is
like
like nothing I have ever felt before
and now I see that dreams and hopes and wishes
are cold
and pathetic
and pointless
because no dream of your hand in mine is
real enough
no hope
of your head in my lap
is good enough
and wishes?
wishes don't fill the emptiness,
don't drown out the noise of the silence,
don't fill the space in my bed
so say it again
do something
do something
do something
I am doing something,
I am doing my very best to hold on to this relationship,
I am doing my very best to keep believing that this will work,
I am doing my very best not to cry myself to sleep at night
in my bed full of space, in my mind full of dreams, in my arms full of -
nothing.